Freakin' database


sorabji.com: Reasons to be cheerful: Freakin' database
THIS IS A READ-ONLY ARCHIVE FROM THE SORABJI.COM MESSAGE BOARDS (1995-2016).

By Spider on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 11:46 am:

    Whoooo! I might get to go home early today (without losing pay) because our database is on fire and can't be fixed without A., and A. is in a meeting in Virginia all day. He tried walking me through the repair function on the phone...it repaired all right, but the problem is still there and besides praying, there ain't nothing more I can do to fix it till he gets back. I have about an hour's worth of work I can do without the database, but that's it.


By Hal on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 12:42 pm:

    I'm going home today because I have a Migraine, and it hurts to fucking blink. I've already lost my pop tart in the bathroom (they don't taste half as good the second time around.) I've considered HERF gunning our server room, it would give me about a week off, and everyone else too.... God that would be fun.


By Dougie on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 12:48 pm:

    What kind of database Spider? Databases are evil. I was wrasslin' with a corrupted Sybase database a couple of months ago, which wasn't pretty. The worst I've ever seen was a couple years ago at my old job, the Exchange server database was fried, and we had to manually move each mailbox out of it, delete Exchange server, reinstall and manually put back each mailbox. Took a whole weekend working around the clock with several admins because the message store was huge. Databases are evil, I tell ya.


By Nate on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 12:57 pm:

    computers are evil.

    i hate computers.


By Hal on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 01:23 pm:

    Fucking liar.


By Nate on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 01:37 pm:

    seriously, hal.


By pez on Thursday, August 23, 2001 - 03:16 pm:

    comps aren't life, they're tools.

    'nuff said.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 08:42 am:

    This database uses MS Access and there's something wrong...ummm...with where it is on the server (or something...I can't remember the terminology) because its corruption seems to be related to how many people use it at a given time. Which is very annoying, considering only 3-7 people ever use it. A. came in this morning early and I found "USubs OK now! AM" on my keyboard when I got in. I've logged in but haven't tested it out yet. Hold on. Yay! It works!

    I got home around 1:00 yesterday. Took some shoes to be fixed and then went grocery shopping. For 2 hours. Just wandered around the store and bought whatever I wanted. The lady behind me in the check-out said "you must have a big family!" I smiled and nodded. hehehe. Spent $116. I am not allowed to buy anything else until mid-September.

    My roommate didn't come home last night. I hope she's with her boyfriend and not dead.


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 10:55 am:

    MS Access isn't a database.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 11:03 am:

    It works as one. It stores all the orders and subscription records and contact info for our clients. And, dammit, everyone calls it "the database," including the IT people.

    It's working smoothly today. A. rocks.


By Hal on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 11:30 am:

    I'm afraid Nate is right.

    We are running DB2 and FoxPro, DB2 is written by IBM and put out by them. We write FoxPro here and distribute it, I find it amusing we use and rely on our own database software, when it sucks so bad.... But we sell it and people buy it...


    Fucking morons.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 11:47 am:

    Fuck Nate. If it acts like a duck and passes for a duck among other ducks, then we can call it a duck.

    The point was: IT WAS BROKEN. NOW IT IS FIXED. HUZZAH.


    About my roommate. Excuse my naivete, but do all girls turn into simpering, smothering flakes when they enter a new relationship? She makes me sick.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 11:54 am:

    I'm retracting the perceivable ire in my first statement. I really just wanted to say "fuck Nate."

    I see the validity of his and Hal's points. We're misusing a term. However, since we all (at work) understand each other when we use this term, I think it's okay to keep using it. We have several different things we use Access for, but we call the big, important one that contains all our info. "the database" to distinguish it from the other things.


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:19 pm:

    you really wanted to say "i want to".

    a lot of people call access a db. by the logic of many people here, when something moves into the spoken language as such it becomes as such.

    as such.

    man, my communication abilities suck cock.

    an excel spreadsheet can work as a database. so can a big wall full of small holes.

    it's just a pet peeve of mine, spider. you can call it whatever you like.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:23 pm:

    OK, got it.

    Can you answer my question about girls?


By Hal on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:25 pm:

    I have to agree, its more a pet peeve then anything. Usually because the asshole Steve in my cubicle constantly uses the wrong terms when he's trying to tell me something and then gets pissed off when I do what he told me to do... ( except I did what he said, not what he was thinking he said.) Fuck it pisses me off.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:31 pm:


    have you ever been goobly over a guy spider?


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:35 pm:

    girls, in general, are emotionally unstable. they desire equality in the big world, but are ill equipped to handle it. when greeted with the potential to match up with a man who will help alleviate the responsibilites of adult life, it has a strong effect on their emotional state.


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:35 pm:

    "goobly", patty?


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:37 pm:

    Yes, but my personality doesn't change dramatically when I'm around him. I'm still me.

    I understand starry eyes and giddiness. I don't understand this.


By agatha on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:41 pm:

    nate, i'm really getting the urge to kick your ass today.

    get down here, quickly!


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:42 pm:

    Nate, I was about to berate you for dragging that other argument into this, but I think you're on to something. She has told me repeatedly that it's important for her to have the power in the relationship. Maybe she acts like this to make him think he's got the power while she secretly manipulates the strings.

    This is her first real relationship. I should probably cut her some slack.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 12:45 pm:

    jesus christ what a partial crock of shit.

    you speak in the present spider. you have a boyfriend?

    how long have you known your roomate?


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 01:01 pm:

    I agree. Game-playing is totally stupid.

    Um, sorta. I don't know, it's weird.

    9 years.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 01:03 pm:

    you have a boyfriend spider?

    if this is her first relationship (how old is she???) i doubt shes being manipulative like you say. Only the jaded work methods like that.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 01:10 pm:

    Patrick, I said "sorta, I don't know, it's weird." Don't get too excited....it could be nothing.

    She's 23, and very cynical about men, courtesy of the violent abuse that occurred in her family (not to her).


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 01:14 pm:

    Meaning, she could very well be that manipulative. She's had experience, just not a long-term relationship.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 02:49 pm:

    Come on, discuss!


By semillama on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 02:56 pm:

    Is she evil?

    What do you mean "you don't know?"

    Is he evil?


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:00 pm:

    sorry spider.

    what exactly don't you understand?

    you can understand being giddy and dreamy but not flakey and coy?

    wow she's 23 and this is her first serious relationship? that seems odd.


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:06 pm:

    she's probably emotionally unstable.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:16 pm:

    I'm just being bitchy.

    She *is* emotionally unstable, though.

    I've never been in a serious relationship either, but you knew that.

    He's not evil. He's just socially awkward, like me. Aw, I get a stupid smile on my face just thinking about him. As God as my witness, I will never be mean or flakey or simpering around him. I'll try to control the giddiness.


By pez on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:18 pm:

    but tease him, spider. tease him to death.


    it's terrible fun.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:23 pm:

    You know it! I love teasing him, the sweet boy. Such a charming sense of humor he has.


By semillama on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:27 pm:

    Spiiiider's in luh-uhv! Spiiiider's in luh-uhv!

    Neener Neener nee-ner!


By pez on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:28 pm:

    is he ticklish?


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:29 pm:

    Yeah, so what? :Þ

    I don't know if he's ticklish. I don't touch him like that. He does blush, though. So do I.


By pez on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:37 pm:

    it's cool to blush.

    someday you'll find out if he's ticklish or not. and if he is, you will use it against him as much as possible.

    i would.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:50 pm:

    Let me tell you about him!

    He's a friend of a friend of my brother's, but he's my age. He's very smart (he studied astronomy) and very well-read, he draws very well, he has the aforementioned charming sense of humor, he's gentle and shy and ever-so-slightly geeky, he pays close attention to me when we talk, and he has a smile that's soft and warm and lovely. He's about 6 inches taller than I am and has dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and rosy cheeks with dimples. I am incredibly fond of him.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:52 pm:

    do not get into the habit of teasing guys.

    thats ridiculous.

    i was tickled bitterly by my brother as a kid.

    to the point where he would sit on me...knees on my arms. i couldnt move...and i would be laughing and crying at the same time....so hard but unable to scream or yell stop or moms attention. Such a feeling of powerlessness.

    He got me so spooked he could just move his hand toward me and id freak.

    it was actually very cruel of him, and therefore i get potentially violent when tickled now if my warnings to stop are not heeded.

    I dont mind it a little bit at first....but even though i may be laughing when i ask you to stop, and you don't because i appear to be laughing.... i have no other way to communicate im getting really angry.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:53 pm:

    Oh, but the thing is, I don't know if feelings are mutual. That's the scary part. I'm of the "let's wait and see,", rather than the "just ask him," school of thought, so I'll be waiting and seeing.

    Funny, I'm listening to the Old 97s sing, "and if you don't love me, would you please pretend?" at this moment. I don't believe in that, though.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:54 pm:

    wait and see and life might pass you by spider.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:55 pm:

    I don't like being tickled, myself, so I don't do it to others.

    By teasing, I mean joking with him. Don't worry: I don't make fun of him or cause him any pain.


By TBone on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:57 pm:

    My girlfriend is ticklish at the least appropriate times, and in the oddest places.

    I was rediculously ticklish in early high school, but I think it was abused too much. It's nearly gone now.


By semillama on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:58 pm:

    I used to be "wait and see". Now I'm 29 and have yet to have a serious relationship.

    Ask him out Spider or I will kick your heiney.


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 03:59 pm:

    Or one or both of us could get scared off! I'm very skittish, and he seems that way, too. That's why I have to wait and see. I mean, I'll continue to see him and go places with him, but I won't do anything like suddenly try to plant one on him or ask him how he would define our current situation or something.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:00 pm:

    its strange....laughing.


    when im accused of something i didnt do, or im not being believed....and its something potentiall serious, I laugh. I laugh out of sheer anger and frustration that I'm telling the truth and the other person is NOT getting it.

    They see me laughing and take me even less seriously, so I laugh some more.

    thats usually when I wish I had a big ass gun i could fire in the air and get everyones attention.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:02 pm:

    ohh stop being a wuss spider.

    express yourself.

    if you want to kiss him KISS HIM! If you want to hold his hold his hand!!!!

    shit maybe he has the wait and see policy two....and the two of ya will just sit there for the rest of your lives wondering if the other one feels the way you do.

    dodo birds!!!




By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:07 pm:

    No, fool! The situation is delicate!

    I have to be careful I don't mess things up. What if he thinks of me as just a friend, and I ruin everything? I would rather be around him as a friend than not be around him at all.

    This calls for discretion, not impulse.


    And what made you think about laughing when you're mad? Are you thinking of the Smiths song?


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:13 pm:

    move on it, spider. you're lying to him by not expressing your feelings.

    the longer you go, the more likely he'll just think of you as a friend.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:13 pm:

    no.

    i cant help to laugh when im not being taken seriously or being doubted. Its out of frustration and anger. Often I can't control hte laughing. The person Im talking to thinks im actually laughing out of good humor which just compounds the problem.



    How could you possibly mess things up by expressing yourself?

    If he wants to be your friend, he will be your friend and you inquiring as to the potential of the relationship is not something that should sabatoge it.


    but you've never been in a serious realtionship.


    so....


By Spider on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:19 pm:

    I'm different. Everytime I've had a male friend let me know he wanted to be more than friends, I've been very upset. I couldn't be around them without feeling terribly awkward, and I don't want that to happen now.

    Cut *me* some slack. We've got a really good rapport. Just give me some time.


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 04:44 pm:

    nobody is going to cut you any slack here, spider.


By heather on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:03 pm:

    "girls, in general, are emotionally unstable. they desire equality in the big world, but are ill equipped to handle it. when greeted with the potential to match up with a man who will help alleviate the responsibilites of adult life, it has a strong effect on their emotional state."



    how should i say this?




    FUCK YOURSELF


By Nate on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:17 pm:

    ah, come now.

    it is a generality, as stated.

    and perhaps i'm jaded by past relationships.

    but i've never seen a man crying at work.

    and if you think about how women, in general, treat each other, versus how men, in general, treat each other.

    the tendancy for excessive sensitivity is firmly in the female court. the tendancy for permenant grudgery is firmly in the female court.


By bingo on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:24 pm:

    Yes, look how emotionally she responded.


By pez on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:32 pm:

    bugger.

    listen spider, do what you feel is right, don't let us bully you into doing anything you don't want to.

    tease him, flirt with him, make him feel special. if he doesn't respond, then it just wasn't meant to be.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:45 pm:

    you girls are craaaaaaazy.


By pez on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:52 pm:

    your point being?
    ?
    ?

    ?


    ?



    ?




    ?









    the word is insane. mental. psycho. weird. strange. mad. loony. sanity challenged.


By patrick on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 05:59 pm:

    hey girly


    wanna hear a wafflesong?

    gimme your email.


By agatha on Friday, August 24, 2001 - 11:41 pm:

    so, crying is unstable? what the fuck?

    didn't you have "free to be you and me" when you were a kid?


By dave. on Saturday, August 25, 2001 - 12:29 am:

    crying IS unstable.

    instability happens.

    for many soldiers who participate in the
    battle between order and chaos, crying is a
    popular strategy.

    drinking is another.


By pez on Saturday, August 25, 2001 - 03:07 am:

    here it is.



    crying can be good, if done right.

    it's a good way to VENT.

    but so's writing, and talking, and so on.


By semillama on Saturday, August 25, 2001 - 03:18 pm:

    An excellent way to vent, I discovered yesterday, is Unreal Tournament. Actually, I didn't have anything to vent, but I still had a blast. My boss installed the game on three of the computers here at work, with more due to be installed. Then I and two of my co-wrokers must have spent an hour and a half tracking each over down and blowing each other into tiny little pieces.

    Damn, I can't wait to do it again.


By TBone on Saturday, August 25, 2001 - 05:09 pm:

    I had a UT addiction a while back. That was when App wrote a Bot with a neural net and it would whip us unbelievably. We'd team up 4 people against the bot and it would mow through us. I killed Igor twice, I think.

    When he was first writing it, he wrote in a function that made him go after people who killed him more often since they were apparently the more skilled ones. But since the damn thing was so good at killing, it translated into revenge during gameplay. He'd be merciless to the ones who managed to kill him once by pure luck.


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